500-POUND MAN SPREAD CORONAVIRUS TO 372 PASSENGERS AFTER WET FARTING IN AIRPLANE ON FLIGHT TO CANCUN
An Illinois man has accidentally infected over 300 passengers with the coronavirus while on a flight to Cancun. Henry Collins, 42, was on a flight...
Tomi Lahren Wants NASA To Rename Black Holes Because ‘All Holes Matter’
By James Schlarmann VAPID VALLEY, TEXAS — Conservative right-wing firebrand commentator and Fox News contributor Tributary Lahren told a radio host today that she was...
Closest McDonald’s Franchise to the White House Files Bankruptcy
By Adam Hawkes CAPITOL HILL — McDonald’s general manager, Richard Reid, says with the former president leaving the White House, the restaurants future looks bleak....
Trevor Noah Exposes Fox News’ ‘Blue Lives Matter’ Hypocrisy
Unlike pretty much every other late-night host, Trevor Noah was still on hiatus when MAGA insurrectionists took over the U.S. Capitol two weeks ago. So...
Newsmax May Not Destroy Fox News, but Will Annoy the Shit Out of It
The fringe right-wing cable network finally took the Fox News behemoth down a peg, but how long will it actually last? After years of cultivating...
Evangelical Scientists Refute Gravity With New ‘Intelligent Falling’ Theory
KANSAS CITY, KS—As the debate over the teaching of evolution in public schools continues, a new controversy over the science curriculum arose Monday in this...
Ron Paul Banned From Facebook For Inciting Dangerous Levels Of Liberty
U.S.—Ron Paul has been banned from Facebook for inciting a dangerous amount of liberty, freedom, and personal responsibility on his page. "Our Community Standards clearly...
MOTHER FORCED SON TO SWALLOW HIS OWN SPERM AFTER HE WAS CAUGHT MASTURBATING TO GAY PORN
An Alabama woman has been accused of child neglect after deputies investigated a 911 call that her 14-year-old son made after he was forced to...
‘BUDDHA ATE CHILDREN’, ‘MUHAMMAD WAS MARRIED TO CAMEL’, CLAIMS CONTROVERSIAL CHRISTIAN SCHOOL BOOK
A Christian children’s book about world religions is sparking controversy within the Muslim, Buddhist, and Hindu community. The author says the book, “Jesus and Only...